I’m pro-choice because…

Well it’s Blog for Choice Day. I’ve been apprehensive about writing this post for a while, not because I’m uncomfortable with the subject but because it’s such a large part of who I am. Reproductive rights epitomize for me a lot of what feminism is about- choice.

I was raised in a Catholic family and went to a Catholic school. My father would cut out articles about abortion and stick them to the fridge, as a silent reminder of…something. He never said, but my sister and I know it signalled some kind of unspoken danger. I was never taught what abortion was; until I was exposed to the somewhat liberal nature of university I thought abortion was killing babies.

My twelfth grade Psychology teacher was nearly expelled for allowing us to discuss the ethics of abortion. The word was not supposed to be mentioned. We were taught in “religion” class that condoms did not work and therefore the only way to prevent pregnancy was not to have sex. There were six pregnant girls in my graduation class- six that I knew of.

But one of the problems with discussing reproductive rights is this incessant boiling down of issues to black and white arguments: abstinence vs birth control, foetus vs pregnant women. I think what feminism has to constantly remind people is that issues of pregnancy are always more complicated, and that’s why only the woman herself can decide what the right decision is for her and her potential future child. A lot of women are misinformed about their own reproductive system; a lot of women are informed but have no access to safe pregnancy protection.

After high school I was involved in an abusive relationship which I didn’t identify as such at the time. Like a lot of women, I had developed the uncanny ability to blame everything on myself and carry guilt around with me like an invisible cross. Every time he hurt me or put me at fault for his own transgressions I would give up a little more of myself and my burden got heavier. We were fairly sexually active and before our relationship ended I had a pregnancy scare- I skipped a period for the first time in my life and felt sick. I was convinced I was pregnant, and close to hysterics I couldn’t face anyone for days. I began to realize a lot of things- that I was petrified to have this baby because I was petrified of who I was, who I’d become. I knew that I had to get out of this relationship and I knew that I would kill myself before I had his child.

I found out in a cold doctor’s office that I wasn’t pregnant and though I was relieved I also realized the gravity of what had happened- I’d grown up in those last few weeks and a pro-choicer was born.

So why am I pro-choice? I’m pro-choice for all those teenage Jane Doe’s out there who are misinformed about their own bodies and their rights as human beings. I’m pro-choice because someday I might have a daughter who will face a hostile world, and I have to have faith that she will have the support and tools to put her own welfare first.

 

Other good links:

Canadian Federation for Sexual Health

Marie Stopes International

Canadians for Choice

One Woman Army – a great summary of abortion rights as they stand in Canada